Check check one two one two

Just to clarify, because it's been asked, the entire purpose of this blog is to give you pictures of me to laugh at, and for you to donate a buck to my laser refractive surgery that I'm hoping to get done at the Iris clinic in Langley, BC on May 5, 2005. I need $1500 to put down when I book the surgery. Thanks to Jenny Z, the total is now down to $2972.50needed. Thanks, Jenny!

So I was talking to my sister on msn. She said the pictures aren't that bad, that they are good pictures, and I don't look like a dork. I don't know why she feels the need to lie to me like this. She had surgery when she was 6 to correct her vision. Yeah, the BC government paid for hers, by the way, she didn't have to resort to putting geeky photos of herself on the web to come up with the cash. Maybe it didn't work and she still needs glasses. Hey, Sara, I have pictures of you with your dork glasses on, and have no fears of putting them online!

Your Geekness...the teen years

Found these gems today from my high school years. Looking at them I'm really surprised I had friends. I was a dork! (I am a dork!)

Exhibit A:



This is me at 17 on an acid camping trip. My friends and I went to Granite Falls and had some good, wholesome fun. See, this is why I'm photographed dumping out a full bottle of brewski. Because I was a good teenager who would never have gotten drunk or did illegal drugs.

Exhibit B:



Le Freak, C'est Geek

This is New Years Eve 1992 - 1993. Yes, despite what I said about the above photo, I was a tad inebriated in this picture. But, its ok! That's my mom in front of me. Getting drunk underage doesn't count if one or both of your parents are right there drunk and karaoke-ing with you.

Exhibit C:



OK, so this isn't me. This was my best friend in high school. She was pretty cool. Except for the one time when we were 15 and we went to Alderwood Mall and she told me to take my glasses off so we could pick up guys. So as revenge, here she is wearing my glasses. Hey Heidi why don't you take those off so people will read my blog? Who's the geek now? Huh? Huh?

A charming four eyed picture

I have to include this picture that my brilliant 7 year old daughter drew of me. (with my glasses on)



What makes her so brilliant? She knew to put a crown on my head, dammit!

Thank you!

Just wanted to say THANK YOU to Jodi and Jane for their first donations! Totals to date:

$200 - gift certificate
$25 - donations

I only need $2975 more, people! I am going back to another seminar on April 2nd in hopes of winning a thousand dollar gift certificate, which would take a nice, big chunk out.

I'm going to be going through old pictures later on this evening to add to the site. In the meantime, here's a token picture of me without my glasses on. 90% of pictures of me have my glasses off, not because I never wear them (I have to or I can't see two feet in front of me) but, like I said, because I hate pictures with them on!



See? Don't I look cute with my glasses off? Isn't this a cause worth contributing to?

Intro to Dorkville

Hi there. See this picture? This is me in 1979. I was 4 years old. I was a d.o.r.k. I am a dork. See those glasses? How can anyone who wears glasses like that be viewed as anything but a dork? This is going to be a blog filled with dorky stories of me and dorky pictures, for the sole purpose of gathering donations to have laser eye surgery done to correct my vision.

I went to a seminar today that Iris put on regarding laser refractive surgery. I have been looking forward to this seminar for 6 weeks. They had another seminar on January 15th but I couldn't attend that one as I was busy planning my mothers surprise 50th birthday party because that's the kind of geek I am, people.

I have wanted laser surgery for about 5 years but haven't thought seriously about it until recently. I am turning 30 in May and have worn glasses since I was 2 years old. I don't ever remember not wearing glasses. I have always been a geek. I can embrace my inner geek...just not my outer geek. I want to know what its like to wake up at 2am and be able to read the alarm clock on my dresser without getting out of bed. I want to be able to wear sunglasses without regular glasses underneath. Hell I just want to know what it's like to look at the world normally and not through a frame.

Do you feel sorry for me yet?



That better? Here I am at 10 years old. I'm the nobby kneed geek with the bad perm eating toilet paper. OK, so I'm not eating toilet paper. I was trying to pull out a tooth. That's my grandpa in the front. As you can see, the bitchin frames enhance BOTH of our geekness. However, I'm not asking for money for my grandpa. He's retired & pinched his pennies, he can get it on his own if he wants, dammit.

If you talk to anyone who knows me in real life, they will tell you its hard to find pictures of me with my glasses on. Every time someone whips out a camera I take them off. I hate my glasses. So, for me to be putting it all out there, every geek picture, I must really want this surgery. These dork pictures will be made public for millions to view. As I go through all of my old photographs I will put every single picture of me with glasses on in this blog.

Why should you donate your hard earned money to my eyeballs instead of to a real charity?
- What is 'real charity' anyways?
- You will see where your dollar is going. A lot of organizations you never really know what happened to that dollar you donated. Did it go towards the cause you intended, or did someone use it to fund their shoe addiction?
- It's only $3200.00 Canadian. That's only like $12.50 US. If I have 3200 visitors and each donate a buck, my surgery is paid for and I am forever eternally grateful to you.
- Feel sorry for me but don't want to just donate cash? Want to help me out but get something out of the deal, too? Well I've got some good news for you! Between now and May 1st, if you place an order through my website, Princess of Passion, and put 'for your eyeballs' in the order comments, every dollar I earn off of that order will go towards my eye surgery. Perhaps you are wondering what I sell? VIBRATORS, BUTTPLUGS AND LUBE! OH MY! Yes, that's right, where else can you buy a dildo and support a good cause at the same time? Only here, in Dorkville.

If you people can read these geek stories about my life and see these horrible photos and not feel compelled to contribute at least a dollar, you are heartless!

To be notified when this blog is updated email canadianpassioned@gmail.com. If you want to email to tell me I'm a geek, if you do it creatively I might just publish it here on this blog.