No autographs, please

Blog moved

2006-04-01T16:54:00.000-08:00

Make sure to update your bookmarks and blogrolls.

WWW.DORKALIE.BLOGDRIVE.COM

All the cool kids are doing it.

New Website

2006-02-02T04:47:00.000-08:00

As you've probably come to realize by the constant screwing around of my template, I'm not too happyw ith blogger and the limitations it gives me, so I've decided to switch my blog over to blogdrive. www.dorkalie.blogdrive.com is where the new site will be hosted and I promise I'll try to update it more often.

hahahahhahhahahahaha

1st Stitch

2006-01-24T09:23:00.000-08:00

He did better with it than I. I never knew a) so much blood could come from a lip, and b) how it would make me almost faint.

Dear Internet

2006-01-24T09:10:00.000-08:00

I'm having concerns about my trip suddenly. My flight lands at 10:40 Thursday night. My sister just booked her flight and it arrives at 9:30. The conversation that caused me concern went something like this:

Sara:Mom said there's slot machines in the airport so I'll have something to do until your flight comes in.
Coralie: Breaking that no gambling clause already, eh?

Are you bringing your cell?
No it doesn't work down there.

Well what if we can't find each other?
I'll let you know what gate I'm at and you can meet me there.

BUT WHAT IF MY SLOT MACHINE IS THE LUCKY SLOT MACHINE?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

It's official

2006-01-12T20:34:00.000-08:00

Not that it wasn't already, but I bought my plane ticket to Vegas today. Woohoo!

Vegas, Baby, Yeah!

2006-01-07T21:18:00.000-08:00

In two months I leave on a paid for trip to Las Vegas to attend ourcompany convention. This was already aiming to be a fun trip, (being as the man and kids are staying home YIPPEE oops did I really type that?) but it just got even better because my sister is coming with me! Woohoo!

Men!

2006-01-04T09:48:00.000-08:00

Last week Kevin came over and him and Chad decided to fiddle with the soundcard. Now I have NO SOUND. Naturally this is the day before Kevin Federline's Papazoa single is released, and I really want to ~~listen to~~ laugh at it. And you know I won't be hearing it on the radio anytime soon, except for maybe those early morning dj's who crack a lot of jokes, and the only way I can listen to the radio in my house is through the sound on my computer, so I'm screwed.

We had a good Christmas, I didn't get many photos, though. The only reason I have that cute one of Carson is because he came up to me and said 'take a picture of me in front of the tree holding a present, mommy'. Riley was at Auntie Sara's for 4 days or I would have had her in the pic as well.

Merry Christmas from Carson

2005-12-21T07:57:00.000-08:00

After Carson got his haircut yesterday he said 'take a picture of me in front of the Christmas tree, mommy! holding a present!' and how could I say no?

Chad bought a hoodie for his nephew with this logo on it:

2005-12-20T21:32:00.000-08:00

He's 12.

Roxanne, click on the picture to see it up close. Holy nipples, batman.

"Death is well understood, it's life that isn't." unknown

2005-12-14T07:25:00.000-08:00

Our community has experienced a sudden loss this week of a great lady. Supergirls's best friend, the beautiful little girl with the long blond hair in the pictures of when we went to the Santa Claus parade last month, lost her mother on Sunday. She died quickly and unexpectedly, leaving behind a husband and two small children. Because of our kids being best friends of course we have a friendship, albeit casual. Our hearts are broken for the family.

It's really hard to know what to write at a time like this.

We would have all made the nice list if it wasn't for a certain someone

2005-12-13T15:28:00.000-08:00

Me:

Chad:

Supergirl:

Cman:

just a little bit crazy

2005-12-10T09:25:00.000-08:00

What Famous Leader Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

Just posting a picture to post a picture

2005-12-09T11:24:00.000-08:00

Because it's such a cute picture of my little melancholy Cman

And one of the 'I don't know why I'm so tired when I wake up in the morning' Supergirl

By the way, Roxanne, if you're reading this, Chad just showed me the pic last night of you in your Halloween costume. I'll have it on here as soon as I have a minute to transfer it to my hard drive.

First Snow

2005-11-30T07:02:00.000-08:00

November 29th, 2005 we got our first snow. BITCHEN!

We live in the one little pocket of Canada where it doesn't snow much. In fact we're lucky if it snows once or twice a year, and if it sticks longer than a day. I don't want to get all excited about the fact that it snowed IN NOVEMBER, meaning hopefully we will get a good dump of it around Christmas.

The last time we had a good winter storm was right after I moved to Canada to live with Chad. It was January of 1996 and there was a good 4 feet of snow on the ground. At the time Chad only had a motorcycle license and I had no car, so we had to walk everywhere. We walked the few blocks to the grocery store and picked up some necessities, and on the way home I slipped on the VERY LAST STEP before our door and sprained the hell out of my ankle. (This is a common recurrence in my life). That night we thought we'd go in the hot tub, hoping it would help my ankle. Our hot tub was on the roof of the garage, and we had to go up some icy steps to get there. On our way back down I slip, yet again and sprain my other ankle. There's a reason they call me Grace.

On a sad note, Chad's grandmother passed away Monday evening after a short battle with cancer. He'll be leaving me home with the kids this weekend while he goes to 100 Mile for the services. Send him safe travel vibes as the roads are icy, and sanity vibes for me, being trapped at home, with no car, and 2 kids.

I think a trip to the liquor store may be necessary.

Somethings wrong with this picture.

2005-11-22T10:00:00.000-08:00

Santa Claus Parade

2005-11-22T07:58:00.000-08:00

Here's some shots of the kiddos:

Cman in his element, on the skytrain, coming home:

ZONK!

A million dollars* to whoever guesses the correct answer*

2005-11-04T05:43:00.000-08:00

1. How many mornings will it be before I stop reaching for my glasses first thing?

2. Why aren't fish called swims?

*i won't really give you a million bucks, because, hey, i don't have it! i only said that in hopes that this would mean i'd win the lottery and have some idjit think they're entitled and try to sue my ass. BRRRING IT!

Craig Hogan, you are a schmoo!

2005-11-03T09:32:00.000-08:00

This happened around the time of my lasik, and I've been meaning to post it when I could see to post it and remember to post it simultaneously. THE PLANETS HAVE ALIGNED!

My business line rang, and I answered it.

"Is Coralie there?"
"Speaking"
"Hi, um, uh, do you know a Craig?"
"Nooo, uh, wait, whats his last name?" Thinking I technically do know one Craig, my stepbrother, however we see each other like once a year and he lives up north so I doubt its the same Craig.
"Craig Hogan"
"Nope, sorry, I don't know him."
"Oooooohhhhhhhhhhh........." (she seems to be stammering and wants to say something)
"Can I help you with something?"
"Well, Craig is my boyfriend and I found your number in his wallet"

Aha! Now it all makes sense!

"Ah, was it a business card?"
"No, it was written on a piece of paper."
"Well..." and I tell her about my line of work "and when I go out with my girlfriends and we meet people my job inevitably comes up, and sometimes people take my number to call me later for orders or to book parties or for their spouses."
"Ooooh, ok..." She still seems unsure.
"Honey, I've been married for ten years and have two kids, sounds to me like you need a new man."
"Yeah, well, we've just been having some problems lately."
"Well, you know what I do for a living now, when you dump the loser call me and I'll hook you up."

She laughs, we hang up.

I'm still wondering whatever happened with that woman and with Craig Hogan. Of course, since I know my number was in there innocently, maybe he wasn't cheating with other women after all.

Buuuut, I doubt it.

I must have been on crack

2005-11-01T08:44:00.000-08:00

Thats the only reason I can think of for signing up as a parent helper at Cmans school the day after Halloween.

Help me make it out alive....

Hi, my name is what?

2005-10-31T21:59:00.000-08:00

I wrote this a while ago but in light of finding a new Aussie bud with the same name I'd repost it.

CORALIE'S KICK ASS, MAN!

***************
When I was a kid I hated my name. It's really one of those names that you don't hear very often, and when you are a small child that totally sucks. Why couldn't I be a Stephanie or a Heather like 12 other girls in my glass?

Now, its the total opposite. I love my name. There's only one me, and maybe 239 people with my name in the entire world. Of course, it'd be better if there was just me and only me, because I rock the name, but I guess I can share it. out of that 239 only 22 spell it the same way as me.

I wanted to by my name dot com a few years back, but it was already taken by french perverts.
Oui Oui!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Reasons why i totally rock and you should totally read my blog all the time. every day. Checking it 5x a day. Like my bitch. Yeah. I said it. That's right, whachoo gonna do about it?

I make/grow my own lavendar and essential oils.

After a long day of planet searching,

I like to give 100% blowjobs & pure anal

on my own island

with my freaky looking dolls watching

4ever!

nuda!

I can give you easy access to the super-morzine bubble.

I am *tight* with Johnny Depps girlfriend.

People make web pages to tell me happy birthday and that i have a beautiful life.

JUST AN FYI THAT IS TOTALLY WORTHY OF THE CAPSLOCK KEY.
It is totally illegal to make cute tops, name them after me, and then not send me one. either color is fine, size large.

Same goes for tiaras. Especially tiaras.

Can you feel the love and excitement?

2005-10-30T05:34:00.000-08:00

My kids and my friends kid obviously looooooooooved the little halloween parade and trick or treat we took. They look soooooooooo enthused. There was fun to be had, but it required an hour of crap first. Last year when we went to this event we were late. We actually didn't know it was happening, we were driving home and drove down the main drag and saw all these kids trick or treating, so we booted it home and I dressed the kids in the car and we got there at the tail end of it all. That is the smart way to do it, because there was a 5 minute line at each trick or treat 'site' (each store on the main strip). Last year we walked right up to each store and got a handful of candy for each kid, because we were the last and there was no one left after us.

The best part this year was the giant Sealy sheep at the bed store. Those sheep are so freaking cute, I've wanted those sheep slippers for a couple years now, but we have a fairly new bed and so do the kids, and I can't go buy a new mattress just for some slippers. HotNuts* would kick my ass.

Can you see my new purse? It is so cute, I heart it.

I love our little town because of all the events that go on like this. We really live in a big city, but we live in a small town within a big city. It's kind of hard to explain. It's actually quite the little area for filming. Well, all of Vancouver is, but our town especially. I don't know if you remember this commercial, it hasn't been seen for the past 2-3 Christmases, but they filmed it here in the summer of 97 I believe? The kid is reading with his grandpa and then gets whisked away on a train through a Christmas town type thing? That was our town. In the summer. It was pretty cool.

Anyway, they film a tv series here, can you tell which one?

Not that you're going to get a prize for guessing correctly or anything.

Our pumpkins:

*HotNuts is the mans new nickname because last Saturday we were invited over to Kevin and Alison's for dinner. I wanted to make some homemade salsa but didn't want to risk chopping the jalapenos and getting it in my still tender eyeballs. I asked the man to do it but said BE SURE TO WASH YOUR HANDS WELL WHEN YOU ARE DONE. Did he listen to me? Noooooooooooooooooooooope. He finished in a hurry because he had to pee badly. While he was in the bathroom I threw the salsa together and then we left. On the way over there he screams 'AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH MY NUTS ARE ON FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!' I seriously had no idea men fondled their testicles as well while they are peeing, but really, is anyone surprised?

Freaking blogger. Why does it give you the option of setting your pics to large when you upload, only to have it screw up the template.

To think I was just talking about quitting...again...

2005-10-29T21:29:00.000-07:00

Candy Cigarettes

You're a total badass, but you don't taste very good.

What Kind of Candy Are You?

I think of a million things to write about. When I get here I can never remember what they are.

I have to go back for another checkup at the end of this week, I'm eager to see what my vision is. Mainly because I'm not really convinced, is my vision improving or is my brain getting more used to seeing further things blurry.

Recovering Four Eyes

2005-10-29T20:02:00.000-07:00

I was under the influence of "eyedrops" during the writing of this post, on October 22nd, and for some reason thought starting a new blog for my post Dorkalie life would be appropriate. I don't know why, I'll always be Dorkalie at heart, so it will turn into my cooking blog that I've wanted to start for a while.

***

Dorkalie no more, those days are gone! I thought I'd find a cool new template I liked, but didn't want to lose the 'dorkalie' site, so I thought I'd just start fresh. If you have dorkalie in your faves, please update your links so you don't miss out on any of my hilarious ramblings and witty commentary. (mmmhmmmmm....)

As of the last post at Dorkalie, I was anxiously awaiting my appointment time. My only fear at this time, being hit by a bus. My friend Jen comes with me, I drive down, she drives back, and is constantly asking me if I'm high because I'm so giddy. HIGH ON LIFE, BABY!On our way through the parking garage we see this:

The guys running it reminded us a little of the 'valet drivers' in Ferris Beuhlers Day Off. No, thank you!

The procedure itself was quick and relatively easy, the hardest part was staying focused on the red light while under the influence of prescribed narcotics.

Afterwards I had to lay down with my eyes closed for 20 minutes and we were on our way home. It was very blurry, the doc said it would be less blurry the next day. I spent most of it on the couch with my eyes closed, sneaking peaks at things. My eyes were extremely irritated, I looked like an extra in a Cheech and Chong flick:

Friday morning things were still quite blurry if they were far, I could see things extremely clear if it was 4" in front of my face. I was going through eye drops like crazy. I had to be back downtown for a 24 hour follow up. I got these bitchen sunglasses that I had to wear outside, hence the current title...

At the appt. the doctor said because my prescription was so strong it could take a couple days up to a week for my vision to be completely clear, and right now it's like I'm nearsighted. With astigmatism, it's like being nearsighted and farsighted because things are blurry close and at a distance. So it was definitely an improvement to see anything clearly without my glasses at all.

I'm almost at 48 hours post-op and today is a huge improvement from yesterday.

This morning I was sitting on the couch with my knees bent, and just staring at the snowflake pattern on my pajama pants because it was so clear. I keep staring at my hands, if you didn't know I just had this surgery you would probably think I was on an acid trip. When Supergirl or Cman come close to me I just stare at their faces, not that I couldn't see them before, I can't describe it, it's a whole new feeling.

Recently someone told me of a quote they had heard, 'if nothing ever changed, there would be no butterflies.' It was one of those things that someone said and it sticks in your hread.

This morning I was on my patio with Chad having a coffee, enjoying the unusually warm fall morning, and what happens to land on our railing.

I could see this butterfly clearer than I've ever seen any other butterfly, and I had a total deja vu. I think of of deja vu's as a guide in your life. If you have a deja vu, it's the worlds way of telling you you are where you are supposed to be in life. I guess I'm there :)

Happy Birthday, Ms Alexandra!

2005-10-27T02:16:00.000-07:00

Did I mention I've been up since 4am?

2005-10-20T07:51:00.000-07:00

I can't sleep. During the night Cman woke me up crying "I can't see, I can't see". When you have a kajillion kids over playing in one room something is going to get broken, and on Thanksgiving his lamp broke, so we've been leaving the hall light on for him and turning it out when we go to bed. Apparently that wasn't good enough this time. I crawled into his bed and snuggled with him, and was almost fast asleep when my mind went 'WAIT A MINUTE! IT'S THURSDAY!' and my heart started beating with anticipation. There was no way in hell I was falling back asleep after that.

Cman would not sleep unless I was in there so he's all curled up on the couch. The only sounds right now are his soft snoring and the clicking of the keyboard. He's sleeping with his arms over his head, just like he did so many times as a baby.

There are two reasons I'm a little bit sad today, despite the whole 'dream come true' thing.

1) R, my little Supergirl, she will be the only one in this house with glasses. I know she hates them as much as I do. I can't wait until she can have the surgery done. I'm sure by the time she is old enough it will be no sweat and hopefully by then our extended medical will cover it, or at least a portion. As far as I'm concerned, if this works, it will be the best money I've ever spent, and if R could have it done now I would pay for it before mine, no doubt about it.

2) I'm going to miss the little 'sexy librarian' thing I had going for me. If you're a chick who's worn glasses you're entire life, that's what people are going to say to you, whether you look sexy or not. People think it makes you feel better about wearing glasses. It works.

Maybe I will get that tiny scrip to fix the right eye all the way to 20/20. If I could get cute, sexeh glasses that were totally optional to wear, I wouldn't mind. It's not having the option, and the option being ugly with big frames and costing almost as much as your first born, that I have objection to.